Happy Friday 👋 !

The Feeling You Get First? Put It Last.

I heard this on a podcast this week and thought it was great advice and wanted to share it.

When something unexpected happens—a deal falls through, a project implodes, someone says the thing you didn't want to hear—there's always a first emotion. Anger, maybe. Panic. That gut-punch feeling of "oh no."

Here's the move: take that first feeling and mentally move it to the back of the line.

It's still there. You're not ignoring it. But you're giving yourself a chance to ask: what else am I feeling? Fear? Confusion? Frustration?

Even if the next emotion on the list is only slightly less intense, you've already bought yourself space. And space is where good decisions live.

​Brendon Burchard takes this further with a visualization I love: imagine you have literal dials on your body for different emotions. Need to dial up enthusiasm for a massive transformation project? Turn it up. Need to dial down frustration so you can actually solve the problem? Adjust accordingly.

Sounds simple. Harder to do when your heart's racing and your brain's screaming.

But here's why it matters.

Change Is Emotional Before It's Operational

We talk about adaptability like it's all strategy, i.e. pivoting plans, learning new skills, navigating uncertainty. And yes, those are all super important.

But underneath all of it? Emotion.

How you process and respond to feelings, especially under pressure, defines how adaptable you actually are. Not how adaptable you think you are, or wish you were, but how you show up when things go sideways.

That's where Emotional Range comes in.

AQai defines this as "the extent to which people experience emotions because of situations in their environment."

Translation: Do you ride the wave of emotions, or do you drown in it?

This shapes everything:

• How leaders handle setbacks and lead with steadiness
• How teams process disappointment and stay cohesive
• How individuals rebound from stress, pressure, or sudden change

In a high-change world, Emotional Range isn't a "soft skill." It can determine whether you adapt or unravel.

🎯 Have You Ever Lost a Deal?

Let's get concrete.

You've spent months chasing a major client. Everything felt aligned: the chemistry, the timing, the fit. Then the email lands: they're going with a competitor. One you didn't even know was in the running.

Ouch.

This isn't just a strategic miss. It hits your ego. Your emotions. Your sense of control.

How you handle this moment reveals your Emotional Range. Let's break down three common responses:

🔴 You're Reactive (Low Band)

"What just happened???? This is a disaster!!!!"

Emotions are intense and immediate—anger, shame, blame swirling together. You might lash out at the team, shut down completely, or obsess over what went wrong. The team dynamic gets tense and defensive.

Adaptability Risk: Decisions get driven by emotion, not insight. Recovery takes way longer than it should.

Coaching question:​
​"What's the story you're telling yourself right now? What else could be true?"

🟡 You're Balanced (Medium Band)

"This stinks...but let's hit pause and make sense of it."

You feel the sting, but it doesn't overwhelm you. You create space for learning and curiosity. You're transparent with the team about the disappointment while staying composed enough to lead them through it.

Adaptability Edge: You can feel and move forward at the same time.

Coaching question:​
​"What's one thing we did well, and one thing we'll do differently next time to close the deal?"

🔵 You're Collected (High Band)

"It's a data point. Let's move on."

You stay calm and pivot quickly. Focused on action, maybe already strategizing the next move. The team admires your steadiness...but they might also feel a little emotionally bypassed, like their disappointment doesn't have room to exist.

Adaptability Risk: You may miss important human signals and lose engagement over time.

Coaching question:​
​"Who on your team might be taking this harder than you? How can you check in with them and help them recover?"

💡 Why This Matters More Than Ever

High-performing teams don't just do adaptability—they feel it.

In today's work environment (one with layoffs, restructuring, hybrid transitions, AI disruption, etc.), leaders who can regulate their emotional responses and help others do the same create:

🧠 Better decision-making under pressure​
🤝 More resilient, connected teams​
⚡ Faster rebounds from setbacks

You can't be adaptable if you're emotionally hijacked.

🧠 Reflect & Adapt: 4 Quick Prompts

Use these in your journal or next team check-in:

🧭 What emotion shows up most quickly when things go wrong?

💬 How do you express emotion at work—and how does that impact others?

🪞 When's the last time you held back emotions that needed to be voiced?

🌱 What would change in your leadership if you had more emotional agility?

🎯 Try This Micro-Experiment Next Week

Next time something doesn't go to plan:

1. Name your emotion ("I'm frustrated," "I feel blindsided")
2. Pause and ask: "Is this the emotion I want to lead from right now?"
3. Choose a response—not a reaction

These small reps build powerful emotional range over time.

🧠 It's a Rollercoaster

Whether you're feeling everything or nothing at all, Emotional Range reveals how well you're wired for the emotional rollercoaster of change.

It's not about having more emotion or less emotion.

It's about being aware, agile, and aligned, or shall we say, adaptable.

You got this!

Ann
​www.adaptsuccess.com​

🧠 Gear Up for Change is your weekly dose of insight on navigating and leveraging change — grounded in AQai’s science of adaptability. If you find it valuable, forward it to a colleague who’s also leading through change and they can subscribe here.

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Want to Gear Up for Change Faster? Here are Next Steps:

1️⃣ Measure Your AQ Take a 25-minute assessment to discover your Adaptability Quotient (AQ). Learn how to thrive in times of change and create a strategy for your growth. Gear up for the rest of 2026 using our companion AQme Workbook. (Tip: check with your manager -- you can probably expense this!) Hit reply and say "Tell me more!".

Issue #61, 16 January 2026